Noticed

You didn’t notice
When we all came searching
I didn’t notice
When I thought I found you

I didn’t notice
When you disappeared
You could’ve thought
It was worse than I feared

Please don’t go somewhere far away,
Please don’t leave me looking for today
When it’s time to let go of everything
That we’ve held so dear
Please don’t notice

I knocked on so many doors
Most of them never opened
But you weren’t anywhere
But they all noticed

Once you’re gone I’ll be afraid that it’s for good
Searching the cards for your reason
We all got shuffled
I hope you noticed

Please don’t go so far as to say
Please don’t come looking for me today
I’ve decided to find the wind
I’ve chosen to fly
I plan on finding my home in the sky

I didn’t notice
The words that you wrote
I only saw your thousands of crumpled notes
And the ones you left behind

We all noticed

Pixels

Finally came across that letter you wrote me from a place that was many miles away
We were younger then,
I remember those times you said it was chasing the light that made you happy;

My darkness approached and with it I carried heavy winds,
The motion of the earth alone burdened me with staying on the ground

And you came, and you saw
That the world I saw was more black and blue
A settled reality too brutal for you
I remember chasing you through the wind

Finally, I came across your screen again
The words read you’ve been missing;
Alone again I’ve been waiting
The hands of time have carried me away

Like the sparrow in her nest
My head was safe upon your chest
And I whispered I’d be back,
As I couldn’t stay away for long

And I miss you.
And I need you.
But I know you’ll never know the way I’ve ever felt.
But I’ll need you now the way I’ve never needed

The Getaway

Flashing red lights remind me that time is more valuable than anything exchanging hands,
To stop and wait for your time under red lights,
Because I know your ride will never stop
And it was worth all our philosophical fights

Dropped gold on diamonds and still got coal,
Compressed, reduced in pressure to give in
And all the silver you stole

I never thought I’d get away with this,
I never thought I’d get away with you

Flashing yellow, light around the edges
Impact on table over and over
It might be solid, but never softer
Taking caution to run away

Dropped the bag and ran,
The most valuable thing I ever had;
The time spent wasted on all our fights
And it was all worth silver and gold

I never thought I’d get away with you
I never thought I’d get a way to run

I was there at the scene of the crime,
In fact I never left; I just found a better hiding spot
The day will come without time
With that will be all that I’ve got

Somewhere At Sail (#5)

Once, when I was young
I thought I could learn to make sense of everything that happened around me,
I found out that I was just an island

I found I could never change
With every push to stop
I was pulled away
Waves of motion, carried us to the sea

Surrounded by the trees, the leaves
You just couldn’t wait to leave
The life around us crawled down our spine
And reminded us that the main land was always fine

How could I have known that in your past you came past this place I now call home?
Like a pair of explorers I was lost
Somewhere at sea,
Instead of in the places I need to be

I’ve been waiting for the day you say it worked out just fine
And that you got yours and that I got mine
Without my compass,
I’ll never find my way

So I guess I will keep navigating the land
If you keep exploring the sea,
Just remember these words,
And promise to always remember me

(1825 and counting)

Tukuturi

You all stood there, unnoticed
Time passes, you slowly are covered by the earth

I was found different than you,
Waiting for my offer to be accepted
Waiting to be accepted even though I am different

History knows we exist but doesn’t understand our existence
How do we gather?
Far from where most men consider civilization
Yet we stay civil

Made up of something different,
I can’t recall the face that gave me mine
We’ve watched the sun travel
The difference between our space

Carved by subtle hands calm in movement
Taken away material to show my face
Crafted I shall never leave this place
I’m alone in looking to the sea

If You’re Reading This

Is it too much to say to an audience of one
That nobody is listening anymore?
That the abandoned buildings came
When nobody left

Skylines started falling,
But the frame work stayed in place
Approaching standards
We all got carried away

If this is all the work of the devil
Why is this the intention?
At the bottom of our ships
We wade tides that once pulled us under

Is it too much to ask for a glass of ice water?
We all deserve to face our liars and whom only aimed to harm us?

If you’re reading this, my signs were posted
Maybe these halls would remember
The exact words we all said
When it would never happen to us

If you’re reading this,
Consider it my last call
My last chance to help you see the world through broken eyes

My letters sent but I paid no postage, just be held up in someone else presence,
If the light shines through,
Will you be the one staring back?

If you’re reading this,
With no way to quit believing
Continued your way
Moving through the motions that changed our lives

My only way to say
I’ve taken more than just time to try and understand
But I really must be going,

If you’re reading this,
Just remember it’s only selfish to want
It’s absolutely necessary to need
Turning the pages back to the start

My darkest hour,
Held up by batteries and connected machinery
If the light still shines for you
maybe someday it will shine for me too

If you’re reading this
and we’ve lost all of the games we play,
Packed right are the things we packed away
We’ve been ready to move away, and be replaced with mirrors with no reflection

If you’re reading this,
And all of the beaches sands have been washed away, and replaced with empty shells
May you remember me

If you’re reading this
And all of your thoughts have been washed away,
Look back for me, pretend these words no longer matter
And remember all we used to be

Iceland

There are times where the water falls,
This fish float away, slowly in schools
What did they want? They wonder
As the legs of two slowly pull apart from another

The current could sweep them off their feet’s and carry them away,
But they just hold still
Watching silently looking forward to the disturbance and it’s departure

Words can be too much, as the expression goes,
A minute can feel like hours when every moment counts
And I can’t count the moments

We leave to come across openness,
But yet we crave the community we formed
And as we are left alone, wondering why this was ever what we wanted
We come to another close

Like a book with unwritten pages,
We turn the time just to find out there was always an ending
Just as joggers find the line that others may never cross,
It was just a matter of time

Broken Timelines

It’s moments like these where words fall apart
Where memories become littered with flashbacks to where this started

Kitchen,
Monday night
You brought out the boxes and said it was time for me to go

You said there was no coming back from this
Tuesday night,
Front porch

I sat there waiting

It’s moments like those where worlds fall apart
Where memories feel like yesterday and the tears start to roll

Bedroom,
Sunday morning
I started yelling about how I felt left alone

You said what loneliness have I given you?
Saturday night
Bathroom

I sat there crying

It’s moments like those where hearts start to beat more than normal
Where memories are thrown away for favor of feeling whole while being empty

But as I pack my stuff away
Thursday afternoon
Basement

It’s moments like those where hearts stop beating
Where memories are held on to one last time

My Hat (Complete Re-Write)

My hat is hung on the stray bullets that barely missed,
Some attempt it was to end my life
You won’t ever find me waiting again

The kids who waited for you to come back and make this broken place
A functional home
The wallpaper we placed to make it feel less empty
And those kids are still waiting

My hat is hung on the moments I left behind,
Some attempt I made to fix my mistakes as they were happening
You won’t ever find me waiting again

The arms stayed waiting for you to come back and make this broken body
A safer place to stay
And the wallpaper we placed to make it look less empty
And those moments lay to waste forever

My hat is hung on the footpath you used to walk
Some attempt it was to lead me home
You won’t ever find me waiting again

The windows are now closed
We’ve let new strangers in
And poured our medicine to our veins
And we waited

My hat is hung on the same coat rack you got me last Christmas
Some attempt I made to come back home
You won’t ever find me waiting again

The doors have new locks
A harder place to find
And the floors are made of stone
And I laid on them trying to find their warmth

My hat is hung in your closet
Some attempt you made when I came back home
Where I found you waiting to be found

Our Senses

Breathe,

Tell yourself it wasn’t your fault
Tell yourself the fire was started by someone you’ve never seen before

Blind man, hold these matches while my gasoline covers you in warmth
And from the ashes your eyes will open

Breathe

Tell them it was their fault
Tell them you saw them start the fire

Deaf man, you could never hear the blind mans screams
And from his ashes your ears will pick up the faintest sounds

Breathe

Tell them it was my fault
Tell them I started the fire

Mute man, say these words and they will set you free
And from that moment on never speak of this day again